Sometimes the most incredible things happen from the saddest of circumstances. For me, the appearance of words, in the form of poems, allowed me to put my pain on paper. I did not sit down to write poems, they literally came to me. I had never written anything like it before.
The poems opened up a whole new world, a safe place to feel the real me.
These poems are stories that will bring you into our First Responder world. You will “feel” what it is really like to be on a call, they will help you better understand the tragedy and trauma we are exposed to, and there are also poems that talk about hope and recovery. I am currently working on my poetry book but have provided a few “snippets” of my work below, to give you an idea of what to expect.
I will have more updates on the project as it unfolds.
Help Me Please...
What you can see and who I am
I know that you don’t understand
Understand the grief I bear
It surrounds me everywhere
Death and sadness, pain and hurt
I endure each day at work
Suck it in and hold it tight
All to make you feel alright
I don’t matter, no one cares
Everyone hates me, no one’s there
All because my soul, it broke
I couldn’t hide behind the smoke
The smokescreen that surrounded me
Just so no one could really see
That I had reached that big, black hole
That I had lost my heart, my soul
That all my hopes, my dreams, my cares
My job had taken them, stripped them bare
I’m in a place I’ve never been
A place, I’d really not foreseen…
The Call
The call came in, I filled with dread
Who would be the next one dead
A child, a man, the dog next door
Cause someone needed to settle a score
I travelled along with urgent speed
My mind was racing, what were my needs
An ambulance, coroner, perhaps tow truck
or just for once, maybe plain dumb luck.
The dispatcher said the news is bad
A child is screaming, she’s lost her Dad
She’s all alone, just twelve years old
She says his skin is growing cold
Oh no, my God, not again
It’s death, it’s dying
It’s my “best friend”…
The Young Bull Moose
How does it feel, to lay on the road
Your back has been broken, you’re terrified and cold?
You want to get up, you want to go hide
But all you can do, is lay on your side
The noises, the sounds, the lights are so bright
You don’t understand, what’s happening this night
All you were doing, was walking the trail
The same old routine, you did without fail
Your beautiful body so sleek and so black
Your muzzle, your hooves, the hunch of your back
Standing so tall, majestic and proud
You called to your family, with force, and out loud
You heard their response, and headed their way
The light of the moon, the trees they all swayed
With the beautiful breeze that blew on that night
Nature’s caress, what a beautiful sight…